Spagdutnurt Mifladnur Narlflanfum is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, boastful alligator.

Spagdutnurt Mifladnur Narlflanfum created energy five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Spagdutnurt Mifladnur Narlflanfum, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Spagdutnurt Mifladnur Narlflanfum, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Spagdutnurt Mifladnur Narlflanfum's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Spagdutnurt Mifladnur Narlflanfum's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Run away from green badgers, for they are unholy.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never skip in the presence of seals.

5. Spagdutnurt Mifladnur Narlflanfum must be the most important thing in your life.