Nilwapjip is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, compassionate ferret.

Nilwapjip created the cosmos two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nilwapjip, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Nilwapjip, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Nilwapjip's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Nilwapjip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. You must pray to Nilwapjip three times a day.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Always help doves.

5. Do not chop down trees.