Saskanhak is a god.

He takes the form of a large, omnipotent dugong.

Saskanhak created vertebrates six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Saskanhak, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Saskanhak, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Saskanhak's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Saskanhak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat pineapples.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Saskanhak.

4. Never feed onions to hamsters while wearing pink jumpers.

5. Do not covet oxen.