Nellhudcap is a god.

It takes the form of a large, stupid crab.

Nellhudcap created the planet Mars nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nellhudcap, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Nellhudcap, it will throw large rocks at you.

Nellhudcap's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Nellhudcap's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never wear red rings.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

5. Do not wear indigo clothing.