Podlimbag is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, ill-tempered goose.

Podlimbag created gold nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Podlimbag, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Podlimbag, it will turn you into a sheep.

Podlimbag's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Podlimbag's Holy Commandments

1. Gulls are not to be trusted.

2. Never sit in the presence of manatees.

3. Never think about planets.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.