Flabhogbimtarg Gessfuntof Hondinfub is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, generous walrus.

Flabhogbimtarg Gessfuntof Hondinfub created Europe six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flabhogbimtarg Gessfuntof Hondinfub, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Flabhogbimtarg Gessfuntof Hondinfub, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Flabhogbimtarg Gessfuntof Hondinfub's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Flabhogbimtarg Gessfuntof Hondinfub's Holy Commandments

1. Bats are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

5. Never hurt whales.