Vabhaswan is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, vain slug.

Vabhaswan created viruses five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vabhaswan, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Vabhaswan, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Vabhaswan's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Vabhaswan's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Otters are not to be trusted.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not hurt hamsters.