Sand is a god.

It takes the form of a thin, slow goat.

Sand created the planet Earth six billion years ago.

If you believe in Sand, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Sand, it will try to impress you with trees.

Sand's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Sand's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never go into purple rooms.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.