Rilyogpak Dabpangbet is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, egotistical swallow.

Rilyogpak Dabpangbet created the planet Mars eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rilyogpak Dabpangbet, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Rilyogpak Dabpangbet, it will make you grow a tail.

Rilyogpak Dabpangbet's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Rilyogpak Dabpangbet's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured manatees.

2. Never wear blue dresses.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never hurt grasshopers.