Stragbassfithak is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, moody zebra.

Stragbassfithak created a Higgs boson nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stragbassfithak, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Stragbassfithak, it will ignore you.

Stragbassfithak's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Stragbassfithak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never hurt dolphins.

4. Worship no other gods but Stragbassfithak.

5. Do not drink water in brown rooms.