Haddagflam is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, fast manatee.

Haddagflam created everything that exists three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Haddagflam, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Haddagflam, it will destroy your home solar system.

Haddagflam's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Haddagflam's Holy Commandments

1. Respect your elders.

2. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Do not dye your hair red.