Ditpodgidbogsaglamyatsom is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, idiotic squirrel.

Ditpodgidbogsaglamyatsom created the planet Venus five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ditpodgidbogsaglamyatsom, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Ditpodgidbogsaglamyatsom, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Ditpodgidbogsaglamyatsom's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Ditpodgidbogsaglamyatsom's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Always treat cats with great respect.

4. Never talk about amino acids.

5. Never paint your face turquoise.