Zanfatgov is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, smart armadillo.

Zanfatgov created snails seven million years ago.

If you believe in Zanfatgov, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Zanfatgov, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Zanfatgov's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Zanfatgov's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear ear rings.

2. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a room before entering it.

3. Always help capybaras.

4. Do not wear lead on your body.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.