Benlin Inglipmon is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, omniscient crocodile.

Benlin Inglipmon created the solar system four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Benlin Inglipmon, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Benlin Inglipmon, he will turn you into a goat.

Benlin Inglipmon's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Benlin Inglipmon's Holy Commandments

1. Put Benlin Inglipmon first in all things.

2. Hamsters are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not take Benlin Inglipmon's name in vain.

4. Do not speak about onions.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.