Vedcapsom is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, all-powerful mole.

Vedcapsom created a bottom quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vedcapsom, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Vedcapsom, it will turn you into a tree.

Vedcapsom's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Vedcapsom's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Always help sick sharks.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Vedcapsom must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.