Fablibpig is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, unfair tortoise.

Fablibpig created a Higgs boson six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fablibpig, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fablibpig, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Fablibpig's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Fablibpig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair brown.

2. Never sit in the presence of mites.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

4. Always wear red.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate tapirs.