Yimcatnart Stanwadmapkad is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, impressive narwhal.

Yimcatnart Stanwadmapkad created Mount Everest six billion years ago.

If you believe in Yimcatnart Stanwadmapkad, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Yimcatnart Stanwadmapkad, she will turn you into a mole.

Yimcatnart Stanwadmapkad's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Yimcatnart Stanwadmapkad's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Yimcatnart Stanwadmapkad seven times a day.

2. Never think ill of sick gulls.

3. Do not wear nickel on your body.

4. You must love Yimcatnart Stanwadmapkad.

5. Yimcatnart Stanwadmapkad loves porpoises, so they must be respected.