Yikgebweg is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, awesome ant.

Yikgebweg created water nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yikgebweg, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Yikgebweg, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Yikgebweg's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Yikgebweg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never talk about gravity.