Hogvoggon is a god.
It takes the form of a very heavy, charitable
armadillo.
Hogvoggon created the Virgo Supercluster nine quadrillion years ago.
If you believe in
Hogvoggon, it will laugh at you.
If you do not believe in
Hogvoggon, it will turn you into a hamster.
Hogvoggon's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.
Hogvoggon's Holy Commandments1. Do not hurt shrews.
2. Never look at asteroids.
3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hogvoggon.
4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.
5. Hogvoggon must be the most important thing in your life.