Stragflatbop is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, self-assured squirrel.

Stragflatbop created viruses twelve years ago.

If you believe in Stragflatbop, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Stragflatbop, he will destroy your home solar system.

Stragflatbop's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Stragflatbop's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if five eagles approach from the south.

2. Never wear white ear rings.

3. Never think ill of sick seals.

4. Hide from yellow rats for they are unholy.

5. Do not take Stragflatbop's name in vain.