Zagcatraw is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, resourceful jackal.

Zagcatraw created the solar system seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Zagcatraw, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Zagcatraw, he will send you a sign.

Zagcatraw's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Zagcatraw's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not dye your hair brown.

4. You must love Zagcatraw.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.