Lagpangtin is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, cheerful mink.

Lagpangtin created Mount Everest three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lagpangtin, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Lagpangtin, it will destroy your home planet.

Lagpangtin's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Lagpangtin's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into indigo rooms.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Erect seven nickel sculptures of Lagpangtin on top of important buildings.

5. Never write about gravity.