Laktaphim Cutbatflamgutbestbinarnveg is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, witty human.

Laktaphim Cutbatflamgutbestbinarnveg created the Milkyway two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Laktaphim Cutbatflamgutbestbinarnveg, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Laktaphim Cutbatflamgutbestbinarnveg, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Laktaphim Cutbatflamgutbestbinarnveg's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Laktaphim Cutbatflamgutbestbinarnveg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. You must never eat coconuts.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Always obey Laktaphim Cutbatflamgutbestbinarnveg's priests.