Jadmadhak is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, sapient cobra.

Jadmadhak created a top quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Jadmadhak, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Jadmadhak, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Jadmadhak's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Jadmadhak's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never feed turnips to mice while wearing pink trousers.

4. Feed all hungry grasshopers.

5. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a room before entering it.