Stafsterfar is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, dishonest crow.

Stafsterfar created the world five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stafsterfar, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Stafsterfar, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Stafsterfar's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Stafsterfar's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Stafsterfar loves otters, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not kill squirrels.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never eat bark.