Vigbabtofkomcapmid is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, boastful wolf.

Vigbabtofkomcapmid created viruses three billion years ago.

If you believe in Vigbabtofkomcapmid, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Vigbabtofkomcapmid, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Vigbabtofkomcapmid's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Vigbabtofkomcapmid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Vigbabtofkomcapmid's name in vain.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate pigs.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Feed all hungry birds.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Vigbabtofkomcapmid.