Dimnillkabnurlnulwon is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, humane lizard.

Dimnillkabnurlnulwon created carbon nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dimnillkabnurlnulwon, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Dimnillkabnurlnulwon, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Dimnillkabnurlnulwon's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Dimnillkabnurlnulwon's Holy Commandments

1. Put Dimnillkabnurlnulwon first in all things.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

4. Always make sure there are no great tits in a room before entering it.

5. Do not cook food in pots.