Gudhugfum is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, cheerful owl.

Gudhugfum created a charm quark six million years ago.

If you believe in Gudhugfum, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Gudhugfum, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Gudhugfum's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Gudhugfum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Put Gudhugfum first in all things.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Hide if three capybaras approach from the east.