Tintabgom Haskopdut Rawgidtif is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, uncaring chinchilla.

Tintabgom Haskopdut Rawgidtif created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tintabgom Haskopdut Rawgidtif, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Tintabgom Haskopdut Rawgidtif, he will turn you into a snail.

Tintabgom Haskopdut Rawgidtif's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Tintabgom Haskopdut Rawgidtif's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention seals.

2. Always help sick manatees.

3. Tintabgom Haskopdut Rawgidtif must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Tintabgom Haskopdut Rawgidtif.