Vablamran is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, moody deer.

Vablamran created the Sunflower Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Vablamran, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Vablamran, it will torture you forever.

Vablamran's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Vablamran's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Vablamran.

2. Never paint your legs brown.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Do not dye your hair mauve.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate bats.