Timbossbim is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, capable crane.

Timbossbim created a bottom quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Timbossbim, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Timbossbim, he will turn you into a mouse.

Timbossbim's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Timbossbim's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Feed all hungry cats.

5. Fast once a month.