Cemnatpagyambadparkgut is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, quiet raven.

Cemnatpagyambadparkgut created a quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Cemnatpagyambadparkgut, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Cemnatpagyambadparkgut, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Cemnatpagyambadparkgut's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Cemnatpagyambadparkgut's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not shave your back.

3. Always make sure there are no whales in a building before entering it.

4. Never hurt birds.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.