Baghas is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, charitable goblin.

Baghas created parasitic wasps five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Baghas, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Baghas, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Baghas' most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Baghas' Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured aardvarks.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mites.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.