Wonhotmil Neggepquat is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, witty rat.

Wonhotmil Neggepquat created bats seven million years ago.

If you believe in Wonhotmil Neggepquat, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Wonhotmil Neggepquat, she will send you a sign.

Wonhotmil Neggepquat's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Wonhotmil Neggepquat's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never talk about comets.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

4. Hide if four pigs approach from the north.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.