Gemdudtig is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, charitable fish.

Gemdudtig created light two million years ago.

If you believe in Gemdudtig, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gemdudtig, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Gemdudtig's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Gemdudtig's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Gemdudtig.

4. Always obey Gemdudtig's priests.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Gemdudtig.