Faggep is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, calm monkey.

Faggep created light seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Faggep, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Faggep, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Faggep's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Faggep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about oranges.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.

5. Never look in ponds.