Garsablarn is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, wise chinchilla.

Garsablarn created the cosmos seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Garsablarn, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Garsablarn, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Garsablarn's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Garsablarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never mention squirrels.

4. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

5. Put Garsablarn first in all things.