Gilbudkarlap is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, unsympathetic swan.

Gilbudkarlap created gold nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gilbudkarlap, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Gilbudkarlap, he will jump up and down on your head.

Gilbudkarlap's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Gilbudkarlap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not laugh in public.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Always wear purple.

4. Never sit in holy places.

5. Never talk about planets.