Flabnullhad is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, happy armadillo.

Flabnullhad created an up quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flabnullhad, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Flabnullhad, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Flabnullhad's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Flabnullhad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat turnips.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Flabnullhad.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never think ill of sick porpoises.