Jiplisttik Targsinyarpcibtif is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, charitable otter.

Jiplisttik Targsinyarpcibtif created bats six billion years ago.

If you believe in Jiplisttik Targsinyarpcibtif, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Jiplisttik Targsinyarpcibtif, she will send minions to preach to you.

Jiplisttik Targsinyarpcibtif's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Jiplisttik Targsinyarpcibtif's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Do not drink water in black rooms.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Always treat mice with great respect.

5. Never mention birds.