Baffobquam Sakfetmadfid is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, selfish bird.

Baffobquam Sakfetmadfid created the planet Venus six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Baffobquam Sakfetmadfid, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Baffobquam Sakfetmadfid, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Baffobquam Sakfetmadfid's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Baffobquam Sakfetmadfid's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip near doves.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Feed all hungry snails.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Baffobquam Sakfetmadfid on top of all buildings.