Yamkentaf is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, overgenerous newt.

Yamkentaf created the Sombrero Galaxy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yamkentaf, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Yamkentaf, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Yamkentaf's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Yamkentaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat oranges.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate seals.

4. Always wear violet.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.