Cabquimpas is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, humorless dog.

Cabquimpas created a charm quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cabquimpas, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Cabquimpas, it will turn you into a worm.

Cabquimpas' most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Cabquimpas' Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick capybaras.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never think about moons.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate hamsters.