Satzagjin Pagrillrow Tabwon is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, charitable pigeon.

Satzagjin Pagrillrow Tabwon created carbon eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Satzagjin Pagrillrow Tabwon, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Satzagjin Pagrillrow Tabwon, it will have a low opinion of you.

Satzagjin Pagrillrow Tabwon's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Satzagjin Pagrillrow Tabwon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Do not kill sheep.

3. Always treat monkeys with great respect.

4. Always make sure there are no whales in a room before entering it.

5. Run away from fawn turtles, for they are unholy.