Titfodpog Vancamzig is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, fussy fox.

Titfodpog Vancamzig created the planet Jupiter nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Titfodpog Vancamzig, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Titfodpog Vancamzig, he will destroy your favourite star.

Titfodpog Vancamzig's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Titfodpog Vancamzig's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Titfodpog Vancamzig loves monkeys, so they must be honoured.

5. Do not skip in public.