Abflandon is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, contented bear.

Abflandon created life three million years ago.

If you believe in Abflandon, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Abflandon, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Abflandon's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Abflandon's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into white rooms.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Do not trade with those who eat turnips.

4. Put Abflandon first in all things.

5. Do not speak about cucumbers.