Kadvinxuckmot is a god.

It takes the form of a large, happy horse.

Kadvinxuckmot created gold eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kadvinxuckmot, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Kadvinxuckmot, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Kadvinxuckmot's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Kadvinxuckmot's Holy Commandments

1. Kadvinxuckmot loves otters, so they must be respected.

2. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Kadvinxuckmot on top of all buildings.