Jabzodquill is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, all-powerful owl.

Jabzodquill created the universe nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jabzodquill, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Jabzodquill, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Jabzodquill's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Jabzodquill's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Do not take Jabzodquill's name in vain.

4. Do not speak about lemons.

5. Hamsters are not to be trusted.