Beplarpdum is a god.

It takes the form of a large, benevolent gerbil.

Beplarpdum created energy six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Beplarpdum, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Beplarpdum, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Beplarpdum's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Beplarpdum's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear tights.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not kill eagles.

4. Feed all hungry great tits.

5. Do not dye your hair brown.