Pitratpad Tiftamkom is a god.

He takes the form of a large, blissful dragon.

Pitratpad Tiftamkom created an electron five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pitratpad Tiftamkom, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Pitratpad Tiftamkom, he will turn you into a snail.

Pitratpad Tiftamkom's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Pitratpad Tiftamkom's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Always help mice.

3. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Always help ducks in need.

5. Never go into red rooms.